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[Jul. 4th, 2009|01:05 am] |
"haha i've never really drunk anything except beer. last time i took a survey that said gentlemen that prefer beer genuinely want to change the beer."
"change the beer?" (i wanted to add in change what beer but forgot)
"eh i meant change the world! >.< u lah! all ur fault!"
"what are you doing now?"
"bathing lol. my phone is wet."
"haha OMG."
...........retarded. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 22nd, 2009|09:50 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  bored | ] |
my macbook crashed :( i actually feel lost not being able to use it! i'm using my sister's netbook now and it sucks because it's so fucking slow and i can't play games. no, not talking about games like cs or dota. i'm talking about games on just y8 and miniclip! oh and just a few internet tabs and it's so laggy already. ugh, gotta bring the laptop down to apple this week.
haha so happy that there wasn't contract law tutorial today and no MBS tomorrow. fuck yeah cos i absolutely hate MBS it's so retarded!! D< oh, no school on friday too! haha yay.
went for my cousin's wedding yesterday at grand hyatt hotel. it was beautiful and her gown was exquisite. everyone was all dressed up and i love seeing all the glitz and glamour at wedding dinners and the love toast was so sweet! the food was great too. i loved the dessert. chilled green tea pudding with longan and berries. it was sweet, light and refreshing so much so that i actually had two and a half servings wth. she had a church wedding on saturday too! oh yes, bride and groom had to play a game. groom had to answer 3 questions and for every mistake made, the BRIDE would have to do a forfeit.
first question: when and where was the first time you met her?
second question: what was she wearing?
third question: when is your father-in-law's birthday, including the year.
he got the second question wrong and so he had to carry my cousin and run up and down the aisle. duration? he had to do it for as long as we clapped and cheered but it didn't last that long because we had to spare a thought for him too! hee. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 18th, 2009|11:34 pm] |
i've been keeping a noobcake's advice in mind and it not only helps me think clearer / see the big picture but it's also comforting. hmm, like mac and cheese or ice cream, just without the calories! hahaha. irony is, the noobcake is like an idiot, very retarded :)
I LOVE AP'S MEMORIAL CAKE PRINT!! i can't decide which colour i like best though. anyway, it seems to be all sold out for now! D: i want the jumperskirt, non halter version.
anyway, working at the pc show was an eye opener and i actually had fun even though it was tiring.
i met kieriel, who is super super cute and we're going to have our ramen outing next week and i got to know kamy, who was uh, ho's ex girlfriend, lol, the people who worked for the acer booth i was also assigned too were really nice and friendly! the pay actually sucks because it's 30 bucks a day so everything's based on commission. i was also happy to see friends who came down to visit! sidi and amirul popped by unexpectedly and waited for us to finish work and we had macs together, yay! mark so nice ah, visited on saturday and sunday and the crane he gave me sort of worked like a lucky charm! and ho also held on to it for awhile and then it seemed like good luck came to him too hahaha. stormy came!! so happy to see her because i haven't seen her in awhile and she bought a laptop too! jane popped by too, all dressed up! didn't expect her to come! :) amanda and justin, some sec school friends, some of ho's friends that i know. now i can't wait to get my pay~!! $$$$$$$$$$.
oh guess what! my phone hanged cos i dropped it too many times and my macbook sort of crashed, wtf. but i think the problem's more or less solved now. somehow, my phone is working faster and better!! so uh, besides working, my holidays isn't all that eventful. i wanted to watch some zombie movie when i slept over at ho's house but i was so tired i just zonked out first. i don't want to watch it alone!! |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 12th, 2009|12:58 am] |
i just can't do it :(
i don't know what to expect but i'll just keep going forward.
anyway, i now HATE alcohol because it doesn't make me high, doesn't make me happy, doesn't make me sad, doesn't give me any feelings. it's like drinking water? okay, it's just like any other normal drink, just that the stronger ones give me bad headaches, makes me nauseous and then i'll proceed to vomit like there's no tomorrow. so yes, it's not worth it! i just feel like a robot when i drink.
coke light makes me happy! slurpee makes me happy! starbucks makes me happy (makes my wallet sad)! |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 10th, 2009|11:45 am] |
my speshul friend is a really very speshul noobcake :) :) :)
anyway, happy 5th month, love. time passes fast. see you later <3 |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 8th, 2009|07:45 pm] |
you give the best advice.
my heart didn't feel heavy after the call and neither does it feel heavy now.
thanks ♥
anyway, i didn't know that emi suzuki, 鈴木 えみ, was born in china! her family migrated to japan when she was 12. i never expected that she'll be from china haha. i always thought that she's either full jap or has western blood. she's always one of the main models for PINKY magazine and she's so pretty! models for jap magazines are usually so skinny but they don't look malnourished and neither do they have bones jutting out very prominently or whatsoever. all their small and delicate bone structures T__T
i jogged for 5.5km today. i feel so refreshed now.
first step to a healthier lifestyle and to make up for all the artery-clogging junk food i've been eating since school started. next step would be to definitely reduce carbs and fats, exercise more, stop snacking on junk and eat fruits, eat more vegetables, drink soup instead :D i also have to cut down on diet coke because it can cause cancer and drink more water. indulge in ice cream / chocolates / whatever once in awhile and if my cravings for ice cream hits, try sorbets, sherbets or frozen yoghurt instead and remember!! portion control. haha okay, so inspired. i guess this will also be used to make up for any amt of alcohol touched or shisha and yes, this will also help me shed a few pounds before my cousin's wedding dinner because most of my cousins are slim. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 1st, 2009|07:53 pm] |
MBS would have been easy if i studied. i did study but i sort of skipped some parts and JENG JENG JENG, the parts that i skipped came out. it was just like, quickly read and move on so today even though i could identify the primary, secondary and foreign keys, i could not explain what they were. i also could not remember the details for the information systems thing so i just crapped my way through! D:
after lunch @ macs, i went to art friend to get mounting boards, glittery paper, rhinestones, sequins, assorted feathers, glitter (love ~sparkly~ stuff <3) and all. i also went to haji lane to see if i could get scrap fabric and i was in luck! haha, so fun to shop for all these stuff and spending lots of time putting paper over paper to see which combination looks better and yes, fun even though i went there alone. saw claire at art friend too!! yay we'll meet up for lunch soon.
went to central to meet joshua and jeff and yvonne came awhile later. both josh and i accompanied them around boat quay and clarke quay to take pictures for their project. for quite some time, the both of us have always wanted to go to c clinic! it's a hospital themed bar / restaurant and it seems really cool! :D can't wait to go there next time. i felt so happy today :) i still need to get used to certain things but i'll overlook them. afterall, it's good to constantly learn and understand more about each other. thanks for the reassurance. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 27th, 2009|09:56 pm] |
i went down to this bank to transfer money to dawn seow during lunch hour and the queue was INSANE. i should get back my atm card soon. it was even longer than the queue during the chinese new year period and 3/4 of the people in the queue were senior citizens. most of them had to queue for a long time too :(
anyway, happy 18th birthday, amirul :) i hope you like the card!!
now i can finally start afresh, properly.
on a random note, i wish my family can shift back to carribean soon because i really love that condo alot. my parents like investing in property for resale or rental. i've moved house for a total of 7 times already and sometimes i really get so sick of shifting here and there like a nomad.
i can't complain though because the ang mohs give us good $$$ for rental every month. maybe we'll shift back to hillside but i'm not really interested because bukit timah area doesn't interest me anymore. it's so far from school and all. not like harborfront is very near school but it's a really convenient area actually.
dad's planning to sell our harborview tower unit away and buy the new condo near zouk or the landed property near pasir panjang area or thomson area (!!!) whatever it is, i just hope we'll be able to settle down into a house and stay there for a long time. HAHAHA i want thomson area just because ho lives near there. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 23rd, 2009|11:38 pm] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Son Dam Bi - Saturday Night | ] |
snuggling and just falling asleep next to the person you love feels so nice, warm, comfy and peaceful :)
a few days ago, a friend asked me, "why don't you usually get together with the guys that like you? what was the barrier? was there even a barrier or did you just not want to open your heart to the person?" i realized that actually i liked them back too but the thing that was lacking was the spark, which comes from physical contact. not that kind of physical contact. more like, i need to feel this strong chemistry when i hug you or hold your hand or when i'm just beside you. haha, i like to stress on the word, "spark". i don't know why. like how caesium reacts with water, HAHAHA.
today's group meeting was not bad, work wise. other than that, i found it fun! :D
so somehow haz started talking about how she doesn't like guys and how she'll never want to be in a relationship because she loves freedom and doesn't want to be tied down and then i told her that she was a plant, as asexual as a plant and yes, i started talking about the spark thing.
mark: OOOH, ~SPARK~ *gives me that look*
amirul said something like yeah you should just put an electric shock thing on your hands hahaha damnit i can't remember the exact words but i found it funny.
haz also showed us this korean gameshow video on youtube. hahaha it was so retarded!! i should put it up here.
went to joshua's house after group meeting and his parents brought his to seletar country club for dinner and to chill. the alcohol wasn't nice :( i was expecting something sweeter haha. but overall, it was fun! watching the live band perform and all.
oh the way to his house, i fell asleep on 167 and my head landed on someone's shoulder. i didn't even realize it until i woke up. i was like, oh shit sorry sorry (damn loudly, everyone turned to look D:) but the eurasian guy said, it's okay, i won't be getting off till the last stop anyway. so embarrassing!! his friends sitting behind started laughing haha oh man, really very embarrassing. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 12th, 2009|09:32 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  thoughtful | ] |
joshua told me about the talk he had with you guys. i promised myself and promised him that this is the last time this sort of shit will happen.
i was never like that last time. i want the old charlotte back. straightforward but diplomatic and always truthful. i'm really lucky to have someone like him to not only walk through this really hard period with me but also to wake me up and bring me back to my senses to snap out of all these shit. i think it'll be hard for me, since we won't be hanging out much together in school but i understand why but i'll find a way to cope, find a way to deal with it.
thanks, love.
what goes around comes around.
karma will bite you in the ass. i just got owned.
but i'm going to be myself, my old self and then time will show / tell and naturally people will notice it and maybe then, while i don't expect friendliness or whatsoever, i hope that they will then also realise that i've changed.
anyway, i also learnt that hurt is only temporary, don't lie because you don't want to hurt someone. in the end, you'll just use more lies to cover up and cover up and cover up so much so that you don't even know what you're talking about anymore.
a LIAR is the worst thing someone can call you. you murder someone, you pay for it with your life too. but being labelled a liar will stickkkkkkkkkk to you till the day you REALLY show that you've changed and you must do it not only because it's the right thing but also because you yourself want to do it.
a fresh start.
for me, i know it's actually it's not hard to change. what's hard is the results of what happened when i screwed up. i'll find ways to deal with it. |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 11th, 2009|10:15 pm] |
i never meant to sow discord with the letters.
i thought admitting things would be better.
i've not finished two other letters i have on hand yet.
but now i guess it's too late.
i screwed everything up, just like that.
i'm glad both groups can get along well now.
of course, no words can describe how regretful and all i am but all these will just come across as wanting to gain sympathy and neither am i going to cry to seemingly gain sympathy. i don't want to sour anything.
i've tried. it failed.
but at least from now onwards, i'll be truthful to myself and to everyone around me.
i've learnt the hard way, even though i've lost all of you guys, i'm going to start anew. it will be very hard, since i'll face so many of you everyday but i guess i'll find a way of coping and emerge a better and stronger person as well.
i should just shut up and just do the right things.
no point explaining and all anymore.
it was nice while all these friendships lasted.
you all really made me so happy. all i can say is, i'm sorry for everything i've done. i don't want to justify myself.
but still, i hope that one day we'll all be friends again.
sounds pretty much impossible but if it's meant to be, it'll be meant to be. |
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| reflections |
[May. 10th, 2009|01:30 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  indescribable | ] |
i screwed up big time because of one mistake i made that was not intentional and to make up for the mistake, i screwed up even more. of course, if i could make up for all the things that have happened, i would do so but it's not as simple as that. i've lost some close and important friends, some of whom i shared so much personal stuff with and vice versa. i guess they think i'm way beyond hope now.
i've decided that it's time for me to have the courage to take the first step and to whom it may concern, you guys will find out what the first step is tomorrow. i am not expecting forgiveness straightaway or expecting any sudden outbursts of friendliness though. and for some of those concerned, even though we're still friends and all, it's just to tell the truth and be honest with my feelings with you guys. i'm prepared to be judged. well not really, because i'm not assertive, neither am i strong. but i know it might happen.
i know what is that something that will lead me to my downfall despite it being unintentional so all the more, i must never let it happen again.
people change. never close yourself off to the fact that people can change for the better. of course, most of us have the perception that a leopard never changes it's spots but i realized that us, for a minority of us who fuck up unintentionally, we want to be sincere when we say that we want to be better people, better friends and generally, just better.
i'm trying to be as honest and open as i can handle. i don't know what will happen after the first step, but at least this is a start.
i wanted to lock this entry but i realized that then, my attempts will be futile already. |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 21st, 2009|03:23 pm] |
SO IRRITATING.
SO IRRITATED.
maybe it's just cause i'm sensitive but deep down i know i'm not.
the signs are so obvious~!! |
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 15th, 2009|09:07 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  awake | ] |
ooh lots and lots of left 4 dead and guitar heroes makes me happy! hahaha i still suck at halo but i'm slowly improving. yeah, improving.
anyway, 3 days ago, the topshops at vivo, raffles city and bugis had this particular tee that i want, lots and lots of it. 3 days later, when i had the money to buy it, it was all sold out, at every outlet. needless to say, i was and still am, very very disappointed. oh well!
i think this is cute.
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| (no subject) |
[Apr. 10th, 2009|11:41 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | awake | ] |
happy birthday noobcake (okay, it was yesterday) and happy 3rd month <3
the surprise party with his sec school friends was pretty awesome! i want to go into details but i'm too tired to do so. i'll just wait for someone to send me pictures or something.
oh but i also played monopoly (after idk how long) with joshua, dexter and jun sheng while the rest played mahjong / did their own things and it was so funny because the guys and i had a conspiracy against my boy, HAHA, he was a little annoyed with me but at least it spiced things up and haha, it's just a game! playing with them was so fun! if not for the time, we'd have continued playing. left at around 3am and midnight surcharge killed me D:
today was our 3rd month and picnic day with the noob together with his family and his relatives (mother's side). i had fun too! everyone was so nice and dinner was great. it's always nice to feel so much warmth and hospitality.
the 8th was his mother's birthday and i was invited to have lunch with them at peach garden. i love peach garden! they have such good dim sum and food there :D expensive but worth the price. oh but i had a pretty horrid time at night because some stuff happened. i almost cried in public (alone!) .
i was at bugis (but derence wasn't working that day so i couldn't look for him but hey derence, thanks so much anyway!). luckily things were okay later on and i was so grateful and happy.
so yes, i'm very broke now because of cab fares!! (ugh, 70+ spent on cab fares in a few days, WTF) as well as food / present / misc stuff. nope, i didn't buy anything for myself. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 31st, 2009|10:30 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  happy | ] |
i had so much fun today and it (more or less) made up for all that shit which happened yesterday~
bought
and
the free stuff were pretty okay! alba rosa tote bag and a jill stuart mini bag.
lots of time was spent reading at kinokuniya today! had a nice dinner at crystal jade too :D |
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| SATSUGAI |
[Mar. 29th, 2009|10:01 pm] |
less than 3 more weeks of holidays before school starts D:
watched DMC at marina square on monday. hahaha it was AWESOME, hilarious and cute! <3 i hope there'll be a sequel.
in a nutshell, i had a great week. spent lots of time joshua (rabu rabu <3) and i love going over to his house. so so so so so much fun :D
his mother (super cute) can cook and bake so well, like some domestic goddess. his grandma is super cute too! also, when i went over on saturday after our guitar lesson, his mum was making quiche and we helped out! it was my first time seeing how quiche was made. i've always wanted to make it but couldn't be bothered to do so because it's really time consuming and you have to prepare lots of stuff.
his family members are so warm and hospitable but i always feel bad cause his dad always insists on fetching me home, even at 11 plus and he has to work the next day.
( nothing really interesting here )
i'm also glad that i managed to catch up with some friends and i can't wait to catch up with more of them because the time spent with them makes me so happy too.
i can't wait for my stuff to come! :D
haha, polaroid cheat.
flowers for vday 2009, squishy teddy bear not pictured. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 21st, 2009|11:38 pm] |
could not go for the rori meet up that kaixin and stormy told me about because i had to go for guitar lesson and my sunburns were horrid and wearing rori will make me feel happy but really uncomfortable D: could not meet stephyweffy either! ugh! missed out on so many things D:
( OOH! let me give you a scenario! just for fun! )
i would like to hear opinions if any, thanks!! |
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